From the mouth of babes... I mean grandmas

Well not most grandmas.... just mine...

Please be aware that what I am posting is very crude and verbatum from my g-ma.... she is a total crack up but says things that I would NEVER in a million years. Please stop reading (if anyone out there is :-) ) if you are easily offended...

As my g-ma laid on the table for her pre-op triple bypass she was telling us about how her normal cardiac doctor came by and was telling her surgeon on how he wants her back when he is through... so I leaned in and said sloppy seconds... huh?

and her reply... no worries, I will clean up and take a douche....

Now it's a couple of days after surgery (thank you doctors!!!!) and she is telling me that they keep coming in and checking her out (lifting her gown, checking the inscissons near her groin...) so I said well tell them to treat you like an envelope (with the intention of following up that statement by saying and start stashing cash in there) and her reply was and have them lick it?

my my my